Trusting?

Posted by Dennis Ng , Saturday, April 3, 2010 10:48 AM

I rarely believe what people say. Because what u hear is usually not true. Often i prefer reading peoples body language and the actions or little things they do. That tells a lot. But at the same time it makes me someone that hardly trust anyone except few who have earn my trust. But i do communicate, to find out ans, truths and to understand more. I will be reasonable.

Unfortunately, my trust and confidence is taken away. It seems so tough to have it back. But only to earn it little by little. I couldnt find a reason to trust and so i struggle. Though i love and desire, but i'm not very willing to trust. But it is really good to learn to trust someone you love, but it doesnt come free. 1 thing for sure, a broken promise and trust is really hard to recover. Sad isnt it? My stand is this, when someone has proven to have no repeated problems (destructive) and has change with actions. That person is worthy of trusting. However, its never immediate, it takes sometime to conclude. Until when sure of correction, then the trust is given and so the relationship will improve and develop again.

I've learn such things from books and stuff. But still it is not easy in real life. People tend to be discourage, and people tend to give up. That its true, thats life. Once u give up, everything ends. Thats exactly how weak humans are. I've not come to that stage yet but i know it is always possible when the will is not strong. Giving up is never right unless its very destructive. I guess its my learning journey.

I wish to give that trust, but it requires a reason to give. And i'm searching for it.

Thankfully i love the other areas about her. She's out going, lovely, cheerful, active, well tempered, resonable, generous. She is not stingy and willingly gives me what she has... food .. sweets... tickets... vouchers... notebooks.. anything and u name it. I do believe she thinks about me wherever she goes too. Be it school, home or work. And i appreicate that. I want her to desire me and miss me.

Personally i feel that in the dancing class, she is the most beautiful of all. And she dance really well... i think that part attracts me quite a bit. She enjoys going out with me and is very fun loving. Overall it is a very good experience. Among all my past experience, i believe she is the most active and out going in the relationship. We spend much time tgt. But i think she is easily weigh down by problems, and friends hardly speak directly to her about problems. Maybe because she is arguementative? I think only wei ting will do that, without harm of cos. That will be something to pick up for her and for me as we communicate. I will try not to burden her too much.

And i made a mistake, saying something bad about her in front of Jun Kang and Rose. I shouldnt have as it brings down her value. I have to keep that in mind. Cos i'm usually very transparent to my childhood friends. Even though i do praise her a lot before my friends, i know shouldnt have said that. I owe her an apology. Its my mistake. I wan to keep her image as a good girlfriend. I will learn not to do that again.