A change of life?

Posted by Dennis Ng , Monday, November 8, 2010 9:17 AM

Have been filled with activities lately. Really enjoy the time with the guys, had great fun. Universal Studio (Lydia actually DRAGGED me to it) , KTV(Kevin, Melvin, Henry) , turtle museum and than kite flying than KTV(Brenda, PJ, Henry) again. I really need some rest man! Haha... but after everything, i seem to feel lonely. I guess i have been filling up this loneliness with activities ever since the break up.

I made a beautiful card for madeleine as a parting gift. I think i miss her companionship a lot. We talked a little. And ya... i took some pictures of the card, but i wont post it up anywhere. The story for this love relationship has ended. I look through all the cards that she made for me, what capture my heart is the black book she gave me, all the times we spend tgt for the year has been recorded in it with pictures and dates. I was so moved, that tears came rolling down reading it. I'm having the bittersweet feeling, such loving moments, so much passion and promises. That ended =)

Well... i have talking to many people, ladies seems to enjoy talking to me. Which to my surprise, PJ who is often so quiet actually came and show me concern, asking me what happen. Than she eventually shared with me her share of past experiences and feelings. I really appreciate it. We actually have a heart to heart talk. Boi... i never expected that and i hardly notice her. Kevin and lydia keep asking me to go for her! Haha... come on.. i am not so SHUI PIAN

Than i also had some good talk with Brenda. Seems like she is a high EQ and sensitive girl. (Henry likes her, but she is attach)Trying to cheer me up and have fun. Asking me to sing songs with her, introducing happy songs, walking me around and wanting me to share my stories with her. Wow... seems like most guys will fall for her. Her eyes can talk and she attracts people. I am usually very careful with such things, i dont fall for it. =) But she will make a good friend.

Haha... I also got surprise from Yi Xin. She actually asked me to accompany her in search for guitar that cost around 1k. I am super willing too!~ Haha. I love guitars. Will be meeting her this sat to show her my guitar during her worship practice. Going to enjoy how she is going to lead worship.

Melvin and Henry comment something on me yesterday and the day before, why girls just come and talk to me so naturally where they did have the chance too? Hm... i dunno how to ans that, i just reply, be honest, sincere and true full. Girls are sensitive and they will know it when u are real. Show sincere care and love. They will appreciate it.

Even saying so, i lost my gf to another guy. I believe that it was my temper that chase her away to another guy, even though i had the right to be angry when she hide all the messages with another guy from me. And it will be something that i would like to learn and overcome. I will never again raise my voice on another girl even if she has done wrong. If she is not proven trustworthy again and again, quit that relationship with her and move on. That's something i have to learn. Getting angry and throwing temper doesnt help at all and actually makes things worst. I mean it is ok to get angry, since it is an emotion that cannot be avoided, but not allowing anger to take control really takes a lot of learning and self control. I will be a better guy, no doubt.

So far no intentions of getting attach soon, but i do wish to know more people and hang out with them. My major focus will be my connection with God for now. Placing my time and devotion on Him. I wan God to heal me and speak to me and i wan to entrust all my desires to Him. May God filled the loneliness and void that i have in my heart. And helping me to make the right decisions. It will be a new journey again for me.

Looking forward to Shenna's Birthday party. haha... cos i also made a card for her =p